Pagan Poetry

Last day of carolling! After today my poor vocal chords can get some well deserved rest!

Because I'm not really into the whole xmas thing, I won't attempt to wish everyone happy xmas. So... Happy Holidays, everyone! =D

P/S: I keep trying to use the Alt key for shortcuts and putting my cursor in the top right corner of the screen expecting the programme windows to move away so I can see my desktop. Sigh... the perils of being too used to using Apple.

Three days straight of carolling, during which I somehow was inducted into the new (and immensely confusing and complicated) choir family - the Milk family. Where there are at least 2 gay couples and I am somehow a single mother who already has a granddaughter ^^;

It's nice that the choir is completely mad again (as usual). We're having fun terrorising bus drivers and fellow MRT passengers with hysterical laughter and singing in parts. I think after concert all hell will break loose (if it hasn't already) and our poor conductors will find themselves bringing a scarily contagious madhouse to Xiamen in July XD

Took the stupid shoutout box down. Yay.

Internship has started, so far so good. I have a feeling I've been stressing people out today because I finished my work too fast and had nothing to do for a long while so I kept bugging people for more stuff. But today is probably an exception to the rule... perhaps its time I learnt to appreciate the times when life cuts me some slack while I still can ^^;

I have a strange feeling that because I have choir practice tomorrow, ironically tomorrow will be a busy day and I will have to work overtime. Let's see how right I am ^^;

I can't post replies on my own shoutout box but everyone else can. Sian... this is so dumb. I think I shall take it down soon.

Your Heart Is Green

Love completes you, but that doesn't mean you seek it out.
When love comes your way, you integrate it peacefully into the rest of you life.

Your flirting style: Laid back

Your lucky first date: Walking around aimlessly and talking

Your dream lover: Is both enthusiastic and calm

What you bring to relationships: Balance

What Color Heart Do You Have?

It's been an immensely tiring week. Had a week of choir camp and now after this evening's carolling session at Suntec Carrefour, I officially have no more voice. Don't know whether can go for carolling tomorrow or not *sigh* But despite all that, I'm having the time of my life! (Yes, crazy, ain't it?)

Starting my internship on Monday, not entirely sure what to expect. I really hope I'll be able to handle juggling both the crazy choir schedule and my work. *fingers crossed*

One last article to finish up, but my brain is slowly but surely giving way to eternal insanity and exhaustion. Perhaps tmr I sho-... zzzzz

Words, Wide Night
by Carol Ann Duffy (1955)

Somewhere on the other side of this wide night
and the distance between us, I am thinking of you.
The room is turning slowly away from the moon.

This is pleasurable. Or shall I cross that out and say
it is sad? In one of the tenses I am singing
an impossible song of desire that you cannot hear.

Lalalala. See? I close my eyes and imagine the dark hills I would have to cross
to reach you. For I am in love with you

and this is what it is like or what it is like in words.

Why do you type so strangely? Your fingers fly across the keyboard as if it were music, not words, that flow out of your tactful ministrations. Lighting on each key, a tap, a music of ungainly rhythm as you think of what to say, as you allow the symphony in your brain to form the delicate swirls of language.

You type the way you used to play - chaotic, running wild and untamed with cheerful disregard for the rules of fingering... free.

And at times those thin fingers, so slender and almost elegant - shaped by years of music and a lifetime of genetics - pause and rest slightly curved and perfectly poised, the tips itching to move forward in a flash of agile conversation.

The nails at the end of your fingers have grown to make you slightly clumsy; the muscles pampered by the pliability of this new musical instrument, are now weak. Somewhere in your mind you justify this gross decay with the practicality of life, of economics (which you've always hated studying and now won't have to bother with after you got your B at the 'A' levels). You promise yourself you love the music enough to sacrifice hours each week enjoying the pure delight and magic beyond all the fantasy books you read, you promise those lazy muscles that one day you'll go back to the orthodox instrument, the one you struggled (and coaxed) and loved (and hated) for a decade.

Between promising and fulfilling lies a chasm of excuses. With those hands on that new keyboard, you begin to play a serenade.

Sonata: Words in G minor.

You know it's going to be a bad exam when you nearly doze off in the middle of the exam because you have nothing intelligent to write and you get sian of the paper.

Sigh. Hurray for my first 'D' grade.

Interesting fact learnt today: "oxymoron" is Greek for "pointedly foolish".

All too often when I study literature, I find myself asking more questions than I could ever answer. First you question the meaning of life; then of death. Then time, memory, identity and self. And then, inevitably, love.

"You said, "I love you." Why is it that the most unoriginal thing we can say to one another is still the thing we long to hear? "I love you" is always a quotation. You did not say it first and neither did I, yet when you say it and when I say it we speak like savages who have found three words and worship them. I did worship them but now I am alone on a rock hewn out of my own body.

CALIBAN
You taught me language and my profit on't is
I know how to curse. The red plague rid you
For learning me your language.
Love demands expression. It will not stay still, stay silent, be good, be modest, be seen and not heard, no. It will break out in tongues of praise, the high note that smashes the glass and spills the liquid. It is no conservationist love. It is a big game hunter and you are the game. A curse on this game. How can you stick at a game when the rules keep changing? I shall call myself Alice and play crocket with the flamingoes. In Wonderland everyone cheats and love is Wonderland isn't it? Love makes the world go round. Love is blind. All you need is love. Nobody ever died of a broken heart. You'll get over it. It'll be different when we're married. Think of the children. Time's a great healer. Still waiting for Mr. Right? Miss Right? and maybe all the little Rights?

It's the cliches that cause the trouble. A precise emotion seeks a precise expression. If what I feel is not precise then would I call it love? It is so terrifying, love, that all I can do is shove it under a dump bin of pink cuddly toys and send myself a greetings card saying 'Congratulations on your Engagement'. But I am not engaged I am deeply distracted. I am desperately looking the other way so that love won't see me. I want the diluted version, the sloppy language, the insignificant gestures. The saggy armchair of cliches. It's all right, millions of bottoms have sat here before me. The springs are well worn, the fabric smelly and familiar. I don't have to be frightened, look, my grandma and grandad did it, he in stiff collar and club tie, she in white muslin straining a little at the life beneath. They did it, my parents did it, now I will do it won't I, arms outstretched, not to hold you, just to keep my balance, sleepwalking to that armchair. How happy we will be. How happy everyone will be. And they all lived happily ever after."

- 'Written On The Body', Jeanette Winterson

Did I mention I love my roomie? I love my roomie :P

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Carpe Diem!

~*~

You fit in with:
Spiritualism

Your ideals are mostly spiritual, but in an individualistic way. While spirituality is very important in your life, organized religion itself may not be for you. It is best for you to seek these things on your own terms.

40% spiritual.
80% reason-oriented.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

You know you've completely gone off your rocker when a gift-wrapped packet drink can make your day.

I finally opened my "present" from Ben today... haha (Thanks, Ben!). It's kind of a funny story really, about our GO-FAR (Aceh) team and our obsessive love affair with Teh Botol.

Teh Botol is literally 'bottled tea'; or rather, sugared water that kind of tastes and looks like tea. We drank ridiculous amounts of it when we were in Meulaboh, and in fact we've occassionally cleaned out the eatery's entire stock of Teh Botol, like so:

So last week, about a month after we got back to Singapore, Ben was off on assignment but had some presents for us. We examined the packages curiously - then someone remarked that it sounded like it contained some sort of liquid. The immediate reaction was a comical look of shared understanding and a chorus of "It's Teh Botol!"

So, yeah. We're probably all going to frame the packet up or something. *LOL*

If you can't read the post below, change your encoding to unicode.

歌曲：相爱很难
歌手：张学友,梅艳芳

最好有生一日都爱下去
但谁人能将恋爱当做终生兴趣
生活其实旨在找到个伴侣
面对现实热恋很快变长流细水

可惜我不智或侥幸
对火花天生敏感
不过两只手拉得太紧
爱到过了界那对爱人
同时亦最易变成一对敌人

也许相爱很难
就难在其实双方各有各寄望, 怎么办
要单恋都难
受太大的礼会内疚却也无力归还
也许不爱不难
但如未成佛升仙也会怕爱情前途黯淡
爱不爱都难
未快乐先有责任给予对方面露欢颜

得到浪漫又要有空间
得到定局却怕去到终站
然后付出多得到少不介意豁达
又担心有人看不过眼

无论热恋中失恋中
都永远记住第一戒
别要张开双眼

If you had the choice between immortality and companionship, which would you choose?

I don't mind being alone. In fact, I rather like it - it's quieter that way. But being alone and being lonely are two different things, and human beings are supposed to be social creatures.

Facing immortality is more fearsome than facing death alone, because there are things more horrible than death - boredom is one of them. And what if there wasn't any meaning to life? Can you imagine enduring the centuries, every day filled with the same futile things and petty concerns?

On the other hand, companionship is a tricky business - something that might be easily solved by getting a pet. Yes, an animal - because the love between pet and master is mercifully free of the questions that plague human couples: Does he love me? Does he love anyone more than me? Does he love me more than I love him? Perhaps all these questions we ask of love - intended to measure, test, examine, and above all save it - all they do is cut love short.

An animal's love is much simpler - it gives, and expects nothing more than company in return... Or am I being too optimistic about animals as well?

Am annoyed with myself. I obviously have no sense of self-control - which is ok except that I'm gradually dragging someone else into trouble now. *feels bad* My middle name is Distraction =(

Saw this flashmovie "Glenn Said" that I found particularly poignant - and, unfortunately, true. Nice graphics and music.

I have been tagged by The River, and I obey *elaborate bow*

Instructions of the tag: Given a topic, you are to write down your answers in your blog, and then send the same topic to 5 other people. Write down the names of these 5 people and link to them on your blog. Go visit their blogs to notify them that they are tagged. The 5 people who are tagged should, in their own blogs, write down the name and the link of the person who tagged them, answer the same topic, and send it to another 5 people, etc.

5 Things About Me:

1) Other people sleep-talk... I sleep-laugh. And I have the impeccable timing of bursting out with laughter when my sis is reading a scary part of a book or when my family members step into the room, etc. thereby freaking the bejeezers out of them.

2) I'm pro-choice but would never abort my own flesh and blood unless there are extenuating circumstances (like health issues where the child's quality of life would be grossly compromised). I'm of the opinion that every creature that has been given life should at least be given the opportunity to experience how over-hyped it is.

3) I eat french fries with chocolate-fudge sundae, among other weird foods. Have also recently developed a taste for the wasabe-mayo from McDonald's and wasabe peanuts.

4) I have very eclectic taste in music. My present playlist for example has an equal mix of 70s disco, chinese pop, alternative rock, canto musicals, heavy metal, and japanese acapella.

5) Instead of saying "ouch", I instinctively meow. That goes for people stepping on my feet, me accidentally knocking into furniture, etc. One of my teammates on my trip to Aceh was terrified of cats and had the misfortune of elbowing me in the ribs accidentally. She jumped about a foot in the air and started looking around for the cat when it was actually just me ^^;

I tag er... whoever wants to do this meme. *is lazy*

Went for the last of my internship interviews today. It's been exciting in a stressful kind of way, and I guess it's a bit of a shock to finally register that it's my third year in university - second last year of actually being a student. (Although, as our dear government branch MOM will tell us, we should be thinking about "lifelong learning".)

Having only recently discovered the joys of pontang-ing class (yes, it may seem incredible, but this semester is the first time I've actually consistently not gone for a certain module), I fear working life will not afford me that luxury. But then again, if I had the misfortune of being so unmotivated to go to work, I wouldn't stay long in that company in the first place. I hope I get to intern at the company I went to today... it sounds insanely demanding and hectic, and I will probably have no life whatsoever. Plus, the people there are mad. Kinda like choir, actually =D

[Edit: I got the job! So yes, I guess between work and choir I will have no life at all, haha. Madhouse, here I come.]

Why do I love? You, Sir?
Because.
The Wind does not require the Grass
To answer wherefore when He pass
She cannot keep Her place.

Because He knows - and
Do not You?
And We know not
Enough for Us -
The Wisdom it be so.

The Lightning never asked an Eye
Wherefore it shut when He was by -
Because He knows it cannot speak
Of reasons not contained
By speech

The Sunrise, Sire, compelleth Me
Because He's Sunrise, and I see -
Therefore, Then,
I love Thee.

- Emily Dickinson

Now they come and finally change the point system. And it will only be in effect after I graduate. What the hell?!

The problem with the camera - both digital and film - is that neither can capture what the human eye sees exactly as it is. It can achieve an approximation, but in the end that's all that it is.

This trip, I saw so many things I wanted to share, and was so frustrated when I just couldn�t seem to capture the essence of that moment in a photograph.

I wanted to share how the stars were strewn across the blackness of the sky like jewels, and how the gibbous crescent was like an arc of gleaming silver. I wanted to share how at 2pm in the afternoon you could see the same moon, peeking out dully grey in the surreally clear blue sky.

I wanted to share the sight of dark storm clouds and vague mountains looming above a forested valley, and the way the dying afternoon sun hit the winding rollercoaster roads and turned the rocky port-holed highways a blinding white.

I wanted to share how the sunset set the sky on fire, and how its embers continued to glower among the clouds, how the human eye continues to see this long after the camera had given up trying to see. I wanted to share how the crashing ocean - an actual, roaring, furious ocean quite unlike Singapore's tame seas - drew white foam arcs that turned the sand into wet rainbows in the blush of sunset.

No photo could do justice to all these. And no photo could do justice to the desolation I felt knowing all I had were words and memory.

Oh I'm leaving on a SMAC plane
Come 17th I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go~
As you can see, the last minute crazy rush to pack my bags before I fly off tomorrow has driven me crazy.

Sorry choristers, about missing the choir outing on Monday!

The NTU Choir performed with the Singapore Police Force Band at their 80th Anniversary Concert last night, and it was so cool singing at the Esplanade! The band's not bad - though I generally prefer orchestras :P And the best thing is that it's the last performance for us until carolling starts in December! Yay!

Now I can go concentrate on the homework avalanche and packing my bags for Meulaboh. *sigh*

Going back to Meulaboh in a week's time - wouldn't have realised how imminent the trip was til Kerri reminded me just now. I feel so unprepared =(

Having mixed feelings about going back, actually. (Yes, "mixed feelings" seems to be my predominant emotion of the moment. 'Mixed' might be a nice way of saying 'confusing' or 'chaotic'. Or, very possibly, 'fucked up'.) On one hand, life there is relaxed and comfortable, nothing like the mad rush of deadlines and looming responsibilities that I've been cowering from for the past few weeks. But there're just some things here in Singapore that I just can't leave behind without feeling a pang of unease.

The only baggage you can bring, is all that you can't leave behind.

NTU's 50th Anniversary celebrations last night - had mixed feelings about it. Despite all the crap we had to put up with - poor time management, sucky catering, long hours, the indignity of making us lip-sync and wave lightsticks that couldn't even be seen under the stage lights - I gather we rather enjoyed ourselves in the end. I think the most fun for most of us was that we had to wear ethnic costumes; the girls had fun dressing up and the guys had fun goofing around in funny accents, haha...

And we had quite a nice surprise when there were fireworks at the finale =D I found my yukata so appropriate! Though we suspect that's where all the money for catering better food for us went =P

There's just something about the death of another human being that disturbs me at a level I can't articulate. Perhaps it is memento mori, the reminder that the Reaper comes to all. Or perhaps it's the incomprehension at such a lack of will to live, despite the understanding that (to quote 'Buffy') the hardest thing in the world is to live in it.

And it doesn't help that about 5 minutes later after I've gone through the whole myriad of emotions from shock to pity, the next question that pops into my head is: Am I supposed to be interviewing people or something?

What kind of monster have I become? >_<

The NTU Choir is performing next Wednesday (24th August) from 12.30pm to 1.30pm at LT19 as part of the ExxonMobil concert series. If you're interested can just come down, free seating and free of charge. Now you can see exactly what I've been doing instead of going for class and doing my tutorials... haha.

Gui Qing's article on the Meulaboh coffee shop was published in Reuters today! =) Read it here.

Watched "The Brutal Affections Of His & Her" yesterday... interesting collection of plays - though perhaps "The Odd Couple" lost a bit of its Neil-Simon-edge with the Singaporeanisation of it besides being, well, the odd one out of the three.

My favourite play by far was "Counting The Ways", a typically Albee script. It was a rather difficult play to pull off, but I gather from the cast that the audience yesterday were more receptive to it than Friday's crowd. I guess absurdist theatre takes a bit of getting used to - but isn't Love absurd anyway? I thought it was admirably apt.

Went to watch 'Charlie & The Chocolate Factory' yesterday... The humour was surprisingly lame ^^; The word made flesh (or, in this case celluloid) by Burton and Depp was also considerably darker than it seemed in the book, but I enjoyed the new quirks of each character, especially the kids. The whole Willy Wonka backstory caught me unawares though, I was a bit disorientated by it. And the Oompa Loompa dances sequences were just... *dies from the cheesiness* Ingenious, but...

Was reminded very much of 'Edward Scissorhands', particularly by the opening sequence and the part where Willy Wonka poses in front of the factory with a pair of huge ribbon-cutting scissors in his hand. And of course the bright cartoon colours and plastic extreme characters were rather reminiscent of the surreal quality typical of Burton's work.

Had dinner and went to see the NDP fireworks - along with what seemed like half of Singapore. (Damn a lot of people... grr.) But after the initial interest and fascination with the light, the fireworks became just a bunch of sparks contributing to the global warming and air pollution. I guess it's true that fireworks are just pointless unless you've got someone special to watch them with. Bleh.

This might seem like a completely random post, but it's not.

Had a lit lecture on the novel "Written On The Body" this week, and the very first line of the book was "Why is the measure of love loss?".

Neil (our lecturer) pointed out that all the so-called "great love stories" of the human civilisation are more often than not, tragedies (See for example "Romeo & Juliet", Cleopatra & Anthony, "Liang Shan Bo Yu Zhu Ying Tai", etc.) Why should the "greatness" of a love be measured by the degree of loss experienced when the love has gone?

Somewhere out there, there's probably a very aged couple who have been together for a long time, shouldering the decades sweetly and peacefully through thick, thin, death-do-us-apart and all that. There might not be any drama in that story, nor any villainous plots to thwart them - but why isn't their story truly the "great" love story?

For those who have not heard me say this, I will say it again: I believe there can be no true happiness without true sadness - the contrast is what gives each emotion its definition. But sometimes things like this book just leap out and accost me and hit me over the head repeatedly, screaming "WHY?!" at the smug mien of my logic.

Isn't it somehow disturbing that we attempt to put Love on an exalted pedestal of idealistic impervious ecstasy, when in reality it is such a convoluted mixture of sorrow and joy? Why must one drink of the bitter waters before realising the intoxication of the sweet? Why is it that human beings never seem to appreciate what they have until it is lost to them forever?

This might seem like a completely random post, but it's not; It's arguably pointless, but not random =P

Just watched "Irreversible" for film class today. Was feeling quite dizzy after it all because the camera kept swirling around. But I rather found I paid too much attention to the technical aspects of the film to be very emotionally involved in the story, so I didn't really find it that upsetting after all. The soundtrack was interesting though, it did make the film rather uncomfortable (A lot of low booms and siren-like noises).

"Battleship Potemkin" next week. I vaguely remember that I didn't like whatever I watched of it. *sigh*

Flowers growing by the mass graves - Ujung Karang, Meulaboh.

Sunset at Ground Zero - Ujung Karang, Meulaboh.

Ruins of building - Suak Ribee, Meulaboh.

Aceh is very beautiful. The waves are awesome, and I imagine before the tsunami polluted the beaches with tonnes of debris and pieces of houses, the coast was really really beautiful. If it weren't for the political situation there I bet it would have become a popular tourist spot eons ago. It's hard to think that over 100,000 people lost their lives there, and that the pile of rubble in front of you used to be someone's home.

It was a really enriching experience, and so amazing because Aceh is so different and yet there are little pockets of comfortable familiarity around. (And it helped that the translator I was with was a complete dear =P)

Feels weird being back in Singapore. Feels weird starting school again. Everything just seems so long ago.

INTERNET!!! *GLEE*

Am in an internet cafe in Medan now. Civilisation, at last =P Nah, it wasn't half bad in Meulaboh, we had a nice house and interesting food. We stayed in an area that was 15 mins walk from the part of the town that was destroyed by the tsunami. But the place has recovered somewhat since, there's construction and rebuilding going on most places and the people are starting to piece their lives back together again.

We stayed at Poskol Temasek, which is also termed the Singapore HQ. There were a few Mercy Relief people there looking out for us, of which our Irish Naval Officer in-charge Edward deserves mention for flirting with everything that moved =P But yeah everybody was really nice and went out of their way to help us. And the locals were really friendly too, the Singapore flag on your id-tag and a camera really goes places around here.

Ok, I've had my cheap thrill of 30 mins of internet access... the rest of my team is waiting for us to go for lunch. Will post more and maybe upload some photos as well when I get back home =D

Went for Cosfest with Jordie and MJ just now. Was quite amusing lar. And some people really put in heck of a lot of effort into their costumes, it was kinda scary really ^^; Most fascinating thing had to be the light sabres that actually lit up and Laire's Luna Lovegood lion hat - the eyes could flash red!

Am leaving tomorrow morning for Medan (that's in North Sumatra), then taking an internal flight to Meulaboh. I should still be contactable via handphone. I think. Sorry about missing the choir practices, I'll try to memorise all the scores before I come back next Tuesday =P Pity my poor travelmates, who will be subjected to the alto part of all the songs! *evil laughter*

Deep breath, here goes... 9 days without the internet. How am I going to check my email?!?! T_T *claws face* (hahahaha...) My only regret is not being able to get my hands on the 6th Harry Potter book on 16th July.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

Which Battle Royale character are you? by liz.

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love?

The problem I always have with ktv is that I can never find suitable songs. Or if I sing, it sounds terrible because it's in the wrong octave, haha. If you don't believe go and ask the people me and Kiat traumatised today with "Moon River" done one octave lower =P I should probably just stick to all jazz next time, except that ktv doesn't have much jazz.

In other news, I have to finish an article and script before I fly off. Am so dying here.

Just a shout-out: There's a Cosfest this sunday (10th July). It's from 1pm to 6pm at Pasir Ris Downtown East, admission is free. Any choristers interested in going to check it out give me a holler!

Nothing much these days, just doing research, writing op-ed, reading Sinfest, going out with my sis, and organising seminars that nobody fucking turns up for. *ahem*

Anyway, have been trying to learn Bahasa Indonesia to prepare for my trip to Aceh. But everytime I read the phrasebooks, I pronounce everything like Japanese and I have a Japanese commentary running through my head, suggesting the Japanese translation of the sentence. (Probably because of all the Jap movies I've been watching.) Somebody help me? Tolong?

And last but not least, a LiveJournal community that slashes Sly with Taufik. They've got fanfiction, icons and fanart - IS THERE NO GOD?! *claws eyes out* *hemorrhages and dies from the horror*

"It's time we started our own struggle."
- #19 Mimura

Which Battle Royale Character are You?
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I never knew malaria pills could cause insomnia and weird dreams. Was reading up on Mefloquine (the stuff that's in the pills) and found that other "more serious" side effects include forgetfulness and confusion. Well I wouldn't be able to tell the difference really, because I'm already forgetful and blur. *laughs*

In other news, I hate doing admin work!

I Wish You Love
(by Nat King Cole)

Goodbye, no use leading with our chins
This is where our story ends
Never lovers, ever friends

Goodbye, let our hearts call it a day
But before you walk away
I sincerely want to say:

I wish you bluebirds in the spring
To give your heart a song to sing
And then a kiss, but more than this
I wish you love

And in July a lemonade
To cool you in some leafy glade
I wish you health, but more than wealth
I wish you love

My breaking heart and I agree
That you and I could never be
So with my best - my very best
I set you free

I wish you shelter from the storm
A cozy fire to keep you warm
But most of all, when snowflakes fall
I wish you love

But most of all when snowflakes fall
I wish you love

Top 10 reasons why gay marriages are wrong (courtesy of Dreamcatcher)

1. Homosexuality is not natural. Real people always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still aren't supposed to marry whites.

5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if homosexual marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears's 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Homosexual couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in North America.

9. Children can never succeed without both a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

I have a love-hate relationship with SMS.

Pros - it's cheaper than calling. SMS also helps because I work better with written/typed words than spoken words. I guess I'm somewhat a visual person, although that probably has something to do with the fact that I'm either (a) losing my hearing and am starting to be unable to hear the higher registers, or (b) have a low voice, and am thus unaccustomed to people who speak at a higher pitch than me.

I'm too absent-minded, so my memories are regarded with intense mistrust. The problem with calling and face-to-face (F2F) conversations is that there isn't a transcript. (Ranks right up there with peeves like "Life doesn't have a search function and I can't find my fucking paper/book/whatever!"). I can't revisit what has been said. But for SMS, there's something tangible and real left that proves such a conversation happened.

Cons - I hate it when I SMS someone and don't get a reply. I never know if it's because the SMS got lost to an eternity of fucked up electromagnetic waves (there was once when a rather important SMS actually arrived a week after it was sent), because the person was so mad at me he ignored my SMS, because the person thought it wasn't necessary to reply, or a myriad of other possible reasons. It's like being caught in constant suspense in a world that revolves around my handphone, which obviously sucks. If I get impatient enough, I usually end up calling.

SMSes can be emotionless and cold. They don't have to be, but they can be. I always aggravate my sister when I reply her messages with just a "k". The English language is already inadequate enough, it really doesn't need to be limited to x number of letters per SMS. Also, sarcasm just doesn't work as well via SMS.

The solution? Er... Short Voice Message Service. That transcribes what has been said, so when you open the SVMS the voice plays simultaneously as you read the message. Yes, I think I'm probably asking for too much =P

Ok, so I did get the room I wanted. (With the kind of points me and my roomie have, they dare to don't give?!) But since Melmel was complaining about the cut-off this year, I went to the website to have a peek.

103.5 points for Hall 7 for guys?! 163.1 points for Hall 6 for girls?! WTF?!?!?!?! How the fuck do they expect people to get 70+ points just to stay in hall? Do they even have any fucking clue how difficult it is to get 70 points?

Is it because people like me spoiled market? *ponders* Well, technically I could have just gone and applied for single room, might have actually gotten it. But my points aren't even that high, it's 126+ after slashing, just enough for me to get a room in Hall 3 without worries. Ok, so maybe it's partly my fault. =P *hides*

And they're pulling down Hall 3 and Hall 7 to build SPMS, and the replacements have smaller capacity. And since they're trying to make NTU all well-rounded and whatever, and still have not built places for the poor SADM and HSS people, I guess they don't have much place left for building new halls. So the cut-off points are just going to get more and more ridiculous.

Wonderful. So I guess when the new Hall 3 is done up with the aircon and lifts and other fancy stuff, I'm going to need a million points or something to stay there in final year.

So long and thanks for all the fish
So sad that it should come to this
We tried to warn you all but oh dear?

You may not share our intellect
Which might explain your disrespect
For all the natural wonders that grow around you

So long, so long and thanks
for all the fish!

The world's about to be destroyed
There's no point getting all annoyed
Lie back and let the planet dissolve (around you)

Despite those nets of tuna fleets
We thought that most of you were sweet
Especially tiny tots and your
pregnant women

So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long

So long, so long and thanks
for all the fish!

(Female Solo)
If I had just one last wish
I would like a tasty fish

(Opera Diva Solo)
If we could change just one last thing
We would all have learnt to sing

Come, one and all
Man and Mammal
Side by side in Life's great gene pool!

So long, so long, so long, so long, so long
So long, so long, so long, so long, so long

So long, so long and thanks
for all the fish!

[All insanity courtesy of having just watched 'Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy'. Just be thankful I watched 'Madagascar' instead of this when I wrote the musical.]

Have added a favicon! (Thanks to DZ... suaku me didn't even know you could add one!) And a shoutout to people using graffiti.net, they've changed the linking url to http://home.graffiti.net/USERID:graffiti.net/file_name

I just had a random idea for a book: a choose-your-own-adventure version of "A Series of Unfortunate Events". The tagline would of course be "Don't bother. You die in most of the endings anyway."

Choristers - a bunch of us are watching 'Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy' at 9.15pm on Wed (15/6), at GV Marina. Please sms/email/msg me if you're interested!

Went to watch 'Mr & Mrs Smith' with my sister today... stupid show ^^; It was amusing enough (they brought domestic violence to a whole new level), but the "plot twist" ain't no plot twist, it was pretty predictable. Just watch it to enjoy the scenery - scenery that comes in the form of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, haha...

But as a plus, saw the trailers for both 'Charlie & The Chocolate Factory' and 'The Island'. Thought the boy acting as Charlie looked really familiar, then realised that I saw him in 'Finding Neverland'. Johnny Depp looks disturbingly Michael-Jackson-esque o_O (And no, it does not help that he invites 5 children to his factory.) It's going to be exceedingly madcap, considering it's Tim Burton and Johnny Depp - the theme song from the teaser is madcap enough. And quote of the day from the trailer - ~~"The squirrel won't like it if you touch his nuts!"~~ ([edit]: sorry, it was "Don't touch that squirrel's nuts!") *giggles hysterically*

'The Island' has Ewan McGregor. 'Nuff said.

KatTj left for Indonesia yesterday, so went out with a few choir ppl to have some sort of farewell lunch for her. Took some neoprints - it's been at least 5 years since I've last taken a neoprint o_O

Went for KTV afterwards. Was super off-key... urgh. My brain is all fried these days - I keep mispronouncing words, misplacing stuff, mistyping stuff, forgetting passwords and the like. Don't know what's wrong with me.

By the way, was unfortunate enough to encounter a wannabe molester on the MRT when I was on the way home. It was this disgustingly fat Indian guy wearing a purple polo tshirt and pretending to be SMS-ing. Stomped on his toes with my heels - hard - and stuck my elbow in his ribs for 3 stations before he gave up and got off the train. IRRITATING FUCKED UP LOSER. Urgh!

Complete sincerity: You believe in being
straightforward with others, and you expect the
same from them. People would consider you a
good listener, and one who is calm and mostly
serious.

Which Characteristic From the Samurai Code Matches You Best? (You may find out your best trait)
brought to you by Quizilla

The Prophet
Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)

When love beckons to you follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.
Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches
that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them
in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire,
that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you
that you may know the secrets of your heart,
and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness
and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter,
and weep, but not all of your tears.

Have discovered that nothing on my playlist works out too well for musical-thingys, because most of it's either alternative rock, soft rock, in Japanese, or just plain idiosyncratic. ^^; Too much scriptwriting. Have been doing scriptwriting for 3 days straight. Also far too many scripts going on at the same time, I'm a bit confused now.

Just saw email from school about attachment. Am mildly amused that they sent us the email about FYP before sending the one about attachment. But anyway, subject registration yesterday for GEs drove me crazy... in the end I just registered for something for the sake of registering - so I registered for Film Studies. Gah. I wanted to register for something ridiculously easy and pointless! Why did I go overload my timetable again?! But as a plus I believe one of the movies we're studying is 'Rear Window'.

To remedy all that, I'm posting for the sake of posting. Whee.

... *have gone nuts* Whee.

Watched 'Madagascar' today. Completely pointless, but very funny. Well, at least it was funny for the choristers who went to watch also - if you can't get the references it's your own problem man =P (I just found out that the voice of the head penguin belongs to the director. Hm.)

And check out this interesting acapella performance - Nintendo themes, with choreo! Heh.

Miss Lim & Mr Yong's music bookshop is officially open! Went down this afternoon with some of the choir people to check out the shop - it's inside Swee Lee by the way, 3rd floor of Bras Basah Complex (beside Popular bookshop I think).

Nice shop space, shelves need a bit of filling up ;) But yeah, it's pretty cool... nice place to hang out, haha. ~~New NTU Choir Clubhouse!~~ When that sofa comes in it's gonna be great. Pop down some time, Kiat & PJ will be taking turns manning the shop, we can all go distract them from actually working! Erm. *ahem* I mean, go help out. =P

Tried inserting Blogger's comments fuction into the template. And you know what? Too fucking troublesome, that's what. Pasting bits and pieces of code around, and because it's all blogger specific I don't even know where to start editing.

Enetation home says they moved the server, hence the down time. Ah well, can wait. Or I might move to HaloScan next month.

And a shoutout to all choristers who don't check your email (and yet have the time to check blogs... -_-#), Madagascar on Monday @ Cineleisure, 9.10pm. Tell me if you're interested by Saturday.

Haven't checked my school email in ages - and got buried under a deluge of company mail. Argh! It's like spam or something. Stop sending me job offers, you stupid companies! I'm not freaking interested in working in your insipid PR officer/sales personnel positions!

Enetation (that's my comments fuction) is throwing its monthly tantrum again. So even though I hate tagboards muchly, I shall put one up at the side. I'll probably remove it when I find a better comments server.

I refer to the article "Grow Up, Guys" in The New Paper, 21st May 2005. (Yes I think I know who wrote it. I'm really sorry, it's not meant to be a personal thing, you understand.)

All the feminists are going to kill me for this, but sometimes I think Singaporean guys really have it bad. They have to spend 2 years of their life in army, just because technically guys are built to be stronger than girls. Then they get criticised for complaining about army, and talking about army all the time, and everyone says they are wusses for doing that.

I mean, duh. They were forced to spend 2 years of their life there, what else do you expect them to talk about? When you're in school, you talk about school; so when you're in army you talk about army lar! And its a national hobby to complain anyway... don't see why girls complaining about immature guys is any better than guys complaining about army.

And what exactly is the definition of "maturity" anyway? Accepting all the shit that happens as their lot in life? Dealing with it, and not complaining, like obedient little pups? Or doing things like washing your own clothes and cooking, and inconsequential little things like that? World poverty, pollution and environmental degradation, intellectual ennui, finding the meaning of life - I don't know about you, but making the bed is pretty low down on my list too.

Besides the average Singaporean guy has a lot on his plate - they're supposed to be sensitive and caring, yet they're supposed to be macho and tough. A bit hard to reconcile the two don't you think? Unless you're like, schizophrenic.

And why is it that guys are expected to make the decisions anyway? They're expected to be the ones to chase the girl, expected to open doors for girls, provide for the family if only one person is working, yada yada blah blah. Slaves to stereotype. If you want to have equality of the sexes (which I personally believe is impossible), then you better deal with the equality in everything.

Look, I'm not saying that the guys have a right to complain. They don't have it worse than the girls, we just each have our own kettle of fish to deal with. But what I'm saying is that the girls aren't exactly in the best position to complain about the guys either - pot, kettle, black. I always thought if someone wasn't happy about something in the world, the answer was to stand up and make a difference, start a change. Not sit there and complain and wait for the difference to just conveniently happen. Girls, if the guys ain't making the decisions, then you better be the ones who start making them.

"Oh god, I love you still, and that's the torment of it. But who will care for me - my love, my dark angel - when you are gone?"
Claudia, 'Interview With The Vampire'

Ok, so I'm obsessive and have watched this movie far too many times. Don't understand why they say Anne Rice didn't like it, it seems far better than any of the film incarnations of her work she actually approved of. Ok, so Armand's age is completely wrong (he's supposed to be 14, not 40). Or maybe she was just unhappy that Brad Pitt was too pretty as Louis and outshone her precious Lestat.

Conclusion: someone who can write a kickass book might not be able to come up with a kickass movie.

There's a shelf of reference books over at Woodlands Library that are actually academic criticisms of Anne Rice. Must drag myself over there some day to devour said books.

I cannot understand parents today. They give their children the weirdest, most unfortunate names. Or even worse - the children go and give themselves weird made-up names. Don't names mean anything anymore? Didn't people use to give names that were infused with hopes, dreams, aspirations?

Some names not to give your children:

Gabriellite - The name I saw on the tag of one school kid on the MRT, the name that started this diatribe. Firstly, it sounds an awful lot like "granite". And what is it supposed to mean? "Gabriel", now with 30% less sugar?!

Romeo, Prince, Elvis etc - Poor kid.

Place names - Like Brooklyn. Why not Manhattan? Liverpool? Milan? Which makes me wonder - I bet Hilton has a chain in Paris, so basically lots of men could claim that they'd been in Paris Hilton. Repeatedly.

Calbert - Like what happens after Calvin grows up and becomes Dilbert's colleague. Or maybe it was some bastardisation of "Calbhach", which means 'bald' in Irish Gaelic?

Chew Shit Fun - The parents must have pissed off the nurse at the birth cert counter.

Kayu - I had a schoolmate with this name. The Bengs in my class took great delight asking him to referee soccer matches.

Kok Buang - So the guy is both kok and buang?

Names that substitue 'i' with 'y' - The worst being those with multiple 'i's, which then becomes "Nyccy" or "Jymmye". It's not the 13th Century, stop spelling like Chaucer.

Elliot - It's a lovely name, I have a cousin with that name. (It's actually the medieval variation of Elijah). Unfortunately, in Singapore, everybody's going to mispronounce it as "idiot".

Went to watch Amityville Horror. Nothing to scream about (pun intended). The vaguely gory dead people and torture had an ick factor, but the drama and psychological effect was lacking. If we want to talk about people in the family getting possesed and psycho, this can't beat "The Shining" - but of course Jack Nicholson and Stanley Kubrick can beat this two-bit film hands down any day. Hollywood has lost the ability to make truly scary, memorable horror films, it's a pity really.

Actually yeah, I covered my eyes mostly at the ick factor parts more than anything, it was kinda gross. The most emotional involvement it managed to get out of me was for the dog (who cares about the humans, pttf).

Madagascar looks good though, starts showing 27th May. Cartoon about zoo animals reintroduced to the crazy wilderness, the trailer is totally funny already. Anybody up for it? =D

Finally got irritated enough with graffiti.net and have now switched my image-hosting to photobucket. *stabs graffiti.net*

In other news, check out yongfook.com's attempt at PodCasting. His co-host is immediately identifiable as being Singaporean. And also immediately gives Singaporeans a bad name by being giggly, kinda boring, and being unable to identify a Monty Python reference even if it danced naked in front of her. *sigh* Also an illustration of how Singaporeans spell like the Brits but speak like the Americans, with a dash of Singlish (even though we're not aware of it). People, the English fucking invented English. So speak like them, not the sodding Americans.

It's been a week since my exams ended and I still haven't had the time to get some good solid slacking done. Sigh...

Saw the email about subject registration. NOOooooo! I don't want to go through another round of fastest-fingers-first! *weeps* Wonder if the fact that I'm specialising next year will mean there'll be lesser people fighting for the places in class. Probably not *sigh*

Division Head says the intersem I signed up for is going to be like a trial FYP. And it'll be a FYP where I'll get to go to a place that, in Allen's words, is a vision of post-Godzilla Tokyo. Oh, the joy. Maybe I'm sado-masochistic.

Choir appreciation last night, completely mad. And it feels really really good to see all the choir people again *gets warm n fuzzy feelngs* ^__________^ Nothing beats a good choir outing/gathering to lift the spirits. And not forgetting the fact that it was appreciation night after all, *hugs all those who for some reason or other, will not be joining us next year* I'll miss you. (Yes, you! Every one of you crazy buggers who've been part of my second family for two years now - and hopefully many more to come.) Once family, always family... there's no escaping us! *evil laughter, hums 'Hotel California'*

At this point the choir is probably starting to sound like it bears a freaky resemblance to a mafia organisation. Well, if you thought The Sopranos were scary, I think our sopranos are actually the sanest of the four sections... *flees from people who are going to kill me for that bout of lameness*

Stayed over at Loong's place with a few others... I've never laughed so hard continuously for at least 4+ hours. I think insanity is contagious (as you can see, I haven't quite recovered yet). By 1am we were in various states of psychosis, delirium and hysteria - and we didn't even have to drink coke. Scary, yar? =P

And an announcement to my lovely fellow choristers: I think it's that time of year again... choir movie outings! Look out for me jio-ing all of you for movies via yahoo!groups and MSN (people who already have the pirated dvds feel free to offer to share so we can pile at someone's house and watch also can... =P)

Dobby is free! ...again.

Dobby does not like this continual cycle of being freed, then being enslaved again. Dobby wishes to be free forever!

Dobby thinks Leprechaun Socks are not amusing at all.

Dobby shivers to think of freedom. A House-elf is not supposed to be asking to be paid! But more than being paid, Dobby wants to be free, free from the bad masters who give the vanishing socks for a joke. 'Tis enough to make a House-elf want to get drunk on butterbeer, it is!

Dobby wishes the bad master would go away.

Oh no! What a terrible thing to say! Bad Dobby! *bang bang bang bang bang* Bad Dobby! *bang bang bang bang bang*

[This programme has been censored due to the graphic nature of its contents. We apologise for any psychological trauma caused, but would like to remind disgruntled viewers to shut their ears in the oven.

The programme will resume when the writer's sanity comes back from lunch, which is never. Thank you.]

Why are all the literature reference materials at Woodlands Library of all the freaking places?! It's all a plot I tell ya... the government and all its disdain towards literature has manifested itself in library policy as well, putting all the lit books at the most ulu place possible.

Pah. So much for all that hypocritical crap about making Singapore a cultured place, yada blah blah. How do you cultivate a Singaporean culture when you're making it so difficult for it to grow? Build some horrendously ugly building, give it a poseur french name, and install it with a library that after so long still has books so new their spines haven't even been cracked yet. And while they're at it, make the lighting so dim and the capacity so small that it just looks all artsy but isn't much use. Whatever. I'm afraid it still isn't equivalent to "culture".

And of course they encourage the paintings, dance, photographs, music, musicals and some theatre. Afterall how political can these mediums get? Or rather, how political can Singaporean artists who use these mediums get? Some issues need language to reach the masses - politics is one of them.

This ranks right up there with the "discussions" about building that wonderful euphemism for casinos, now called "integrated resorts" by all major news channels/newspapers. (The same people who call the "inadvertent" casualties and destruction inflicted on civilians in the course of military operations 'collateral damage'. How nice.)

Squash the poets/writers on one hand, and on the other hand, let appalling things like "Phua Chu Kang: The Musical" cast its beastly pall over the land. Hey I like Gurmit Singh, he's a great guy. But there are better things than a pathetic caricature of an Ah-Beng in yellow boots when it comes to showing an international audience a symbol of our nation. Or perhaps Singaporean culture is about commercialised crassness afterall, and if so I'm joining Dreamcatcher in the search for our definition of a dream house - an ivory tower.

Only one paper left - Brit Lit! And that doesn't count because I will be very happy studying for it... haha.

Attention: This is a public service announcement.

As a media student, I feel somewhat responsible to point out that the internet is full of rubbish.

I know, some of you are gonna call me a pompous self-important bitch because media students aren't the only ones discerning about information they find online. But the fact remains that after blog-surfing (and general surfing, and other non-studying related activities) I find a disturbing amount of people who get exposed to information, then swallow it hook, line and sinker. And yes, this includes all those stupid cutesy chain messages that go "iF U tReAt mE aS A fReN, pLs foRwARd tiS tO mE n eVeRyboDy eLSe oN uR fRenLiSt!!!11!!" or "if you don't send this to x number of people, you're gonna have bad luck / your wishes won't come true" etc. (This also includes spreading that email about the female ghost with yellowed teeth and acidic drool... if you're reading this you know who you are!)

Some of you may find little touching messages cute and inspirational. You may come across stories that are amazing, funny, sweet, whatever. Fair enough, I do too, and I have come across some nice stuff from forwarded emails. I mean if you absolutely HAVE to forward because its so heart-wrenching, fine. What I'm urging everyone to do is to not compulsively forward everything that comes along, not just through emails but through bulletin boards, forums, etc.

It does nothing more than clutter up the information superhighway - yes, it's a superhighway and theoretically the potential capacity approaches infinity but unfortunately in reality it does not, yet.

This also goes for hoax virus warnings, health warnings, news, etc. Frankly, people who originate these prankster emails should be shot. Like I finally received the article from "The Onion" about Michael Jackson's death, and since it was an edited screen capture (without The Onion's masthead), it was pretty misleading for the uninitiated. Then there are those credit-card scams (help the poor starving children of wherever), or the classic Teddy-Bear-virus hoax that actually tricks people into deleting a valid windows file (jdbgmgr.exe). Some are just innocent pranks but imagine if they convinced everyone to delete an important windows file? It'd be as good as a DIY virus.

So please, everyone who reads this blog - be more sceptical about information you find online. Always double check with reliable sources such as anti-virus software official websites, and some pretty good websites dedicated to stamping out hoax emails (I personally recommend Hoax-Slayer).

Ok I think I've ranted enough... next time when I'm feeling all indignant I'll rant about something else. Maybe biased news reports. Haha...

It is with some amusement that I realise I wrote things like "LOL!" and "dweebs!" in the margins of my readings where funny but utterly useless facts caught my attention. For example, in 1584 a guy called "William the Silent, Prince of Orange" was assassinated (Dreamcatcher suggests that if he were Jewish he'd be The Prince of Orange Jews! Wonder if they had to use a silencer when they shot him). Another guy, an English preacher by the name of William Partridge, declared in 1697 that the world would come to an end imminently, and in 1699 he issued another statement in which he sadly noted that the world had in fact come to an end but that no one had taken notice. *ROTFL!*

Watched "Kate & Leopold" just now. (They even followed the Victorian literature naming convention - perhaps unintentionally - like, well, 'Sense & Sensibility' and 'Pride & Prejudice' and also using the main characters names, ie 'Jane Eyre' or 'Emma'). Kind of soppy - doh, Meg Ryan, Queen of romantic sop - and an interesting but occasionally inconsistent story. The time travel bit was interesting, and I liked the way her ex (Steven? Simon? Steward?) explained the part about seeing the crack in time as the way a dog sees a rainbow. It's there but the dogs can't see it because they can't see colour, and when he tries to tell the other dogs, the dogs shut him up in the hospital.

Hugh Jackman is... *swoons* - I do believe I have the vapors! (Nah, it's like what Emma Thompson said, it's just us girls being ridiculous for the fun of it... haha.) And can you believe that incredibly cliched scene where he was on a white horse? *rolls eyes* But he does do a tolerable English accent for an Australian. Probably because both his parents are English.

Unfortunately, the characterisation of Leopold is somewhat inconsistent and hence, for me, incredibly distracting. For a guy out of 1876, he seems awfully open minded about spending the night wrapped up in the arms of a girl he isn't married to when before he insisted that she might require a chaperone when she had dinner with her boss. And worse, sitting out there on the balcony with his arms around her! And kissing like that in front of everyone! Has he no sense of propriety? *is scandalised! LOL*

Well, to be fair I missed the the first half-an-hour of the show so I might possibly have missed some explanation for all the costume mistakes, but argh! Since when did they wear singlets/singlet-looking-things? Guys from the late 19th Century don't wear singlets, they wear undershirts and his undershirt looks nothing like an undershirt. And as any gentleman should know, they have to wear hats. And why is he wearing that thing that looks like a military coat? Frock coat, people, or a dress coat. And not a white silk tie, a white silk bow tie. Somebody shoot the art director!

Remember the documentary about Al-Jazeera (The Control Room) I posted about? It has a website! And a movie trailer! Am so amazed, haha. See it here.

Now I not only want to buy "Farenheit 9/11" and "Bowling For Columbine", I also want to buy "The Control Room" and "Outfoxed!". And this is coming from the person who avoided watching the news for eons after September 11, because everything was so depressing. Since when did my VCD/DVD-wishlist get so politically-charged? Hm. I guess that's the "problem" with wonderful charismatic teachers who get you all rah-rah about the stuff they teach.

I just read one of my readings, titled "Buddhist Economics" (by E. F. Schumacher). It is like, damn weird... but it is rather interesting. Basically the guy postulates that the modern "accepted" idea of economics is a faulty one, merely a habit rather than the most efficient one. So we should aim to achieve maximum satisfaction from minimum consumption, instead of just blindly trying to increase consumption in hopes of somehow attaining maximum satisfaction.

And so, according to him, we should also reverse globalisation (why bother reaching so far when you should be able to find everything near you?), go back to traditional patriarchal society (because having women working instead of looking after kids is unproductive and takes away jobs from men), and conserve our non-renewable resources.

Maybe in an alternate universe that might work. Unfortunately, since the world does not seem to have a restart button, and most of the world is already inevitably shaped a certain way, this radical restructuring he advocates is probably always going to be just words written in an academic journal. And actually I'm in two minds whether I even want something like that to work... I guess the whole world is just afraid of change.

Choir outing to watch The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy anyone? Brit film based on the book, release date is probably some time at the end of April (if we follow the UK/US release time), but I think for Singapore the release might be much later... like during the school holidays for the kids or something.

You can also access the official website here. Loading time's not too good, but Marvin the Paranoid Android is too cute ^___^

As you can see, the fact that I had time to make a new layout generally means that I'm not studying. *laughs*

After reading a copy of Fortune magazine I got free, I've suddenly realised that blogger.com actually belongs to Google now. No wonder it's so easy to find blogs hosted by blogger through the google search engine...

One paper down, three more to go.

tHu5 2 tHo53 wHo t1nK t4t t3chn1c4L 4rTif4cT5 h4v3 PoL1t1c5, I s4y 2 u: n00bs!!!!!111!! Wh4t m4tt3R5 15 nOt t3cHnOLoGy itS3Lf bUt teh Soc14L oR 3coNoMic 5y5t3M in wh1ch iT's 3M83dd3d. TiS is teh Soc14L D3t3RMin4t1oN oF t3cHnOLoGy N is teh kewlest 4eVa cuz iT s3Rv35 4s N33d3d coRR3ctiV3 2 n00bs wHo F4iL 2 LOok bhinD t3chn1c4L tH1nGs 2 nOtiC3 teh Soc14L c1RcuM5t4nc3s oF tH31R Dv3lopm3nt, DploYm3nT N uS3.

Good lord. Somebody tell me I did not just translate one paragraph of my readings into pseudo-|33t... ARGH. Stupid discussion about whether artifacts have politics is driving me crazy.

...*scary maniacal laughter*

Number of icons made: 8
Episodes of Inuyasha watched: 14
Rounds of Spider Solitaire played: 68
...
Number of chapters revised: 2

^_^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Attention: The followng is a message to Miss Ng Tse Wei.

Most new DVD players should be able to read all the codes... or at least the Singapore ones can, and I bought mine more than 2 years ago. All of the DVDs I own are region code 1 or 2 anyway. Heh.

And by the way, your comments function is evil and insists that I'm a spam spider. Maybe your settings are a bit too high?

Watched "The Woodsman" just now. Strangely enough, everyone in the audience was Caucasian. Damn weird. Anyway, was kinda worried that I'd end up watching another artsy movie and get depressed, which would then render me incapable of work for the rest of today. Luckily, I found the movie quite a beautiful one about shame and frailty, but also about strength. Kevin Bacon delivered a very nuanced performance... thought it was a really difficult role, but frankly he was stunningly good.

Also discovered that Cineleisure has a nice cozy little theatre tucked away out of sight, that's used exclusively for premiers and movies with limited release. If anyone has gone to Theatre 6, that's the one.

I have a sudden tremendous urge to re-read every single book in the house. >_< Bad habit that always comes about when exams draw near. Unfortunately, because I've read everything so many times already, sometimes all I need to do is read the first chapter or so and I'll remember everything - takes all the interest out of it. Time to go buy some new books, or perhaps make a trip to the library.

Exams? Homework? What are those?

Books I'm going to be on the look-out for: the last 2 installments of Stephen King's "Dark Tower" series, Lemony Snicket, Alfian's "Corridors" which I still haven't been able to get from Bedok Lib because according to the OPAC it's gone bloody missing, Terry Pratchett, perhaps a stack of good non-fiction. And of course, Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince (103 days to 16th July!). Anything else you'd recommend, dear readers?

Human Nature
(by Madonna)

You wouldn't let me say the words I longed to say
You didn't want to see life through my eyes
You tried to shove me back inside your narrow room
And silence me with bitterness and lies

Did I say something wrong?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
Did I stay too long?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't speak my mind

And I'm not sorry
It's human nature
And I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me

You punished me for telling you my fantasies
I'm breakin' all the rules I didn't make
You took my words and made a trap for silly fools
You held me down and tried to make me break

Did I say something true?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
Did I have a point of view?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about you

And I'm not sorry
It's human nature
And I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me

[I'm not apologizing]
[Would it sound better if I were a man?]
[You're the one with the problem]
[Why don't you just deal with it]

[I don't have to justify anything]
[I'm just like you]
[Why should I be?]
[Deal with it]

By a sheer stroke of luck, I happened to catch a documentary about Al-Jazeera on CNA this afternoon. After my stupid presentation on Thursday, all the material I had gotten online seemed to suggest that Al-Jazeera was a terrorist propaganda machine happily spreading anti-American sentiment in the Middle East. The Al-Jazeera, which has been called "the CNN of the Middle East", is also one of the most trusted news stations, with 41% of the population of the opinion that 80% of it is true.

However, after watching the documentary (I think it was called "The Control Room"), you've got these guys who are former BBC reporters in the station, and the senior producer actually hopes he can send his kids to the US to study and he can "exchange the Arab nightmare for the American dream". What anti-American sentiment? The only thing they seem to really hate about America is the way Bush is just screwing up these people's lives with his stupid "smoke them out of their holes" strategy (which basically translates to bomb everything in sight and out of sight, and if we drop enough bombs maybe we'll hit them). And then there's Hassan Ibrahim (I believe he also uttered the immortal "Democratize or I'll shoot you."), former journalist for BBC's Arab News service, who asserts that he has absolute faith in the American people, and that "the United States will stop the United States Empire".

It's like what the US Marines Corp Comms officer said, that every station is just reporting for their people. I mean, these guys are there and they're watching their people die. You expect them to be shiny happy people asking you questions politely when your commarades are out there bombing their country into smithereens? There was plenty of anti-MidEast sentiment on the media when 9/11 happened, so what makes Americans so justified to say they're not in the wrong?

Sometimes I think America is completely delusional. They think the world bloody revolves around them or something. Look at the kind of arguments they put out; EU can't sell arms to China, 'cause that would "threaten U.S. security interests". WTF? And the US happily building up their own military power isn't threatening the security interests of other countries? Fascinating logic. And the next thing you know, Bush is going to be reading very sincerely from his script about how Osama bin Laden is suspected to have spent the last few months digging an underground tunnel through one of his caves, and now he's in North Korea convincing them to use weapons of mass destruction on the US.

Had a lecture this afternoon about Modernist writers - people who basically believe that there is no way to convey the truth, that humans are just doomed into perpetuity, and the whole human race should just give up and die. (Ok, maybe not quite in those words.) But anyway, my lecturer decided to use the present media coverage of the wars in Afghan and Iraq as an example of how the truth can never be really conveyed. And since I happen to have a presentation this Thursday about media and public opinion of terrorism, I started thinking that if the truth could never be conveyed, and I'm going to be presenting with material that are presented to me as true facts, then I'd be perpetuating a lie. So should I disclaim that I am not in possession of all the facts? But then again everything is a lie because nobody can or will ever truly know everything about everything, which is why we can never communicate the truth in the first place. So everything is a lie, and I'd be communicating untruths about untruths to people whose lives are a lie (since they cannot and do not know everything even though they think they do) in a setting that is artificial and forced, which compounds the lie, and -

As you can imagine, my mind has been chasing its tail around the whole day since then. Giving me a massive headache.

And now I shall attempt to go back to doing my work while my annoying mind overloads itself and yaps constantly in my head. I leave you with this snippet of conversation:

"I got very bored and depressed, so I went and plugged myself into [the ship]'s external computer feed. I talked to the computer at great length, and explained my view of the universe to it," said Marvin.

"And what happened?" pressed Ford.

"It committed suicide," said Marvin.
(Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy)

You scored as Buddhism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Buddhism. Do more research on Buddhism and possibly consider becoming Buddhist, if you are not already.

In Buddhism, there are Four Noble Truths: (1) Life is suffering. (2) All suffering is caused by ignorance of the nature of reality and the craving, attachment, and grasping that result from such ignorance. (3) Suffering can be ended by overcoming ignorance and attachment. (4) The path to the suppression of suffering is the Noble Eightfold Path, which consists of right views, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right-mindedness, and right contemplation. These eight are usually divided into three categories that base the Buddhist faith: morality, wisdom, and samadhi, or concentration. In Buddhism, there is no hierarchy, nor caste system; the Buddha taught that one's spiritual worth is not based on birth.

Buddhism

96%

Paganism

75%

agnosticism

67%

Hinduism

63%

Islam

58%

Christianity

54%

Judaism

54%

Satanism

50%

atheism

38%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

Check out this short film! It's written, directed, produced, and edited by my friend Jacen, who also acted in it and composed the music. Good stuff. Got into finals of the SAE National Film Fest 2005 and a mention on Mr. Brown's blog too. The film is in Singlish/Chinese/Hokkien, but it's got English subtitles.

Just came across an advertisement for a new and interesting product:

Like the ubiquitous candy "conversation" hearts, "BitterSweets(tm)" are made of flavored, chalky-tasting sugar and sport messages on their faces. But unlike other candy hearts, ours are stamped with bitter musings and mockeries perfectly suited to the dejected spirits of those who will spend the holiday alone, or wishing they were.

"BitterSweets(tm)" are the perfect gift for you OR for someone you love, especially if that special someone is one who doesn't want to hurt your feelings but just doesn't feel that way about you but still wants to be friends so they can torment you with stories about their crushes on someone who doesn't appreciate them like you do, can't love them like you can, and actually takes pleasure in corralling a herd of fawning "just friends" behind themselves as they indulge in one self-destructive relationship after another, with no hope of ever finding true love, despite an army of souls eager to lavish it upon them.

(You know what we're talking about.)

Supplies are limited. But the pain that accompanies them may not be.

Available in two distinct options. Multi-colored, multi-flavored hearts (tastes like five different types of chalk!) and also in white breath mints.

*ROTFL*... I love Despair.com

Just came back from Bintan (courtesy of invitation from Audrey-Ann - thanks so much for inviting us and hope you had a great birthday!). Had a great time lazing around in the sun and walking along the beach looking for hermit crabs =D Am now literally half-baked... haha. *corniness*

Back to the grindstone.

Never get the NTU Photo-Videographic Society to film anything for you. Unless of course you're looking for aesthetically deficient, technically incompetent and common-sense challenged idiots.

First of all - someone should tell him that three-legged thing called a tripod is supposed to help you keep the camera steady. It's not for shoving up your ass - which might have been what the moron did 'cause that would certainly explain the Blair-Witch-Project wannabe camera motions.

Aside from the fact that the guy apparently has Parkinson's Disease and had an epileptic fit for most of the concert, he also focused on the wrong people (like not having the solo singer in view at all), focused on the same people for the entire musical so that I hardly saw myself, and is incapable of zooming in and out smoothly, or panning smoothly. For that matter, he can't even keep two stationary people in focus. I suspect a trained chimpanzee could have done a better job.

Last but definitely not least, the editing. Never mind the erroneous, ugly subtitles. Never mind the missing starting of "Here, There, Everywhere" because they were changing tape or something. Never mind the inconsistent colour tone and lousy image quality. They inserted techno music for the credits. This is a choir concert, for crying out loud! What does the guy have in place of his brains, saline solution?! And he refuses to give us the original footage.

And then they had the absolute temerity to charge us $60 for it. An absolute disgrace - you have no idea how utterly depressing it is to consider that these idiots belong to the same species as me. It's one thing to be feckless and useless, and another thing be so inept when you're doing this for a client... if there were a Consumers' Association in this freaking place, I'd sue the skins off these imbeciles. We should have just left the camera on a tripod, at least it would be steady.

Someone should yank the balls of these guys over their heads and then hoist them up a flagpole by their own innards as a warning to others and to appease the Gods of Videography or whatever. In fact, give me their addresses and I'll do it.

It is with great disconcertion that I realise one thing - exams are in 5 weeks. WTF?! Where did the semester go?

An Arundel Tomb
(by Philip Larkin)

Side by side, their faces blurred,
The earl and countess lie in stone,
Their proper habits vaguely shown
As jointed armour, stiffened pleat,
And that faint hint of the absurd -
The little dogs under their feet.

Such plainness of the pre-baroque
Hardly involves the eye, until
It meets his left-hand gauntlet, still
Clasped empty in the other; and
One sees, with a sharp tender shock,
His hand withdrawn, holding her hand.

They would not think to lie so long.
Such faithfulness in effigy
Was just a detail friends would see:
A sculptor's sweet commissioned grace
Thrown off in helping to prolong
The Latin names around the base.

They would not guess how early in
Their supine stationary voyage
The air would change to soundless damage,
Turn the old tenantry away;
How soon succeeding eyes begin
To look, not read. Rigidly, they

Persisted, linked, through lengths and breadths
Of time. Snow fell, undated. Light
Each summer thronged the glass. A bright
Litter of birdcalls strewed the same
Bone-riddled ground. And up the paths
The endless altered people came,

Washing at their identity.
Now, helpless in the hollow of
An unarmorial age, a trough
Of smoke in slow suspended skeins
Above their scrap of history,
Only an attitude remains:

Time has transfigured them into
Untruth. The stone fidelity
They hardly meant has come to be
Their final blazon, and to prove
Our almost-instinct almost true:
What will survive of us is love.

And you know what is the saddest thing about this poem? That in the end it's only an "almost".

Another random poetry post! Was suddenly reminded of this poem by a comment someone else made on a friend's LJ. And I also feel a need to point out that Larkin's technique of using that phrase as the last line of this poem very artfully sums up his argument - that if you don't pay attention to the details and only see the beautiful things that stand out (like the last line of a poem), then you only see the beautiful things and fail to notice the sad truth of reality. < / end random snippet of literary criticism >

Anyway it's my dad's bday today. Happy Bday Dad~ =D

I just handed in my Division Selection form with Journalism as 1st choice. *covers head and waits for bombshell to drop* Took me all of 5 seconds to regret handing in my form, and then figured it was in actuality a decision that was made a long time ago. (And the weirdness that is me strikes again! I make decisions before I've realised that I've made them, then proceed to argue with myself. It's never any use though. I'm too stubborn for me to convince myself.)

In other news, have accumulated a perverse amount of ECA points for some unknown reason. If only I could convert them to bonus marks to pull up my grades... sigh.

Just saw on the news: 54 year old guy posting advertisements at bus stops asking for a bride. Which is fine until you realise he wants women aged 21 - 40, who are capable of providing a living for herself and whatever children they might have as a result of the union.

What is wrong with these people?! I mean, looking for companionship is one thing, but this is just... just... *mind boggles* It's like saying he wants marriage with the sex and minus all responsibilities - a completely weird relationship which ceases to be called "marriage". Watching him whine on TV in the interview, about how he really isn't asking for much, and I'm utterly repulsed. And he wonders why he's not married?

"To dance, clap hands, exalt, shout, skip, roll on, float on."

Concert is over! Joy! And we actually managed to pull off quite an enjoyable performace apparently... heh. Yay-ness. It's a bit weird... but I'm missing the choir people a bit already.

You know it's crazy, that's what all the people say~~

"Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed.

Now the politicians are sayin', "Send in the marines to secure the area", 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number was called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks.

Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic.

So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorroids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they'r servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State.

So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president."

-'Good Will Hunting'

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the reply I have to Thomas Friedman's op-ed in The New York Times ('A Day To Remember', February 3rd, 2005). A reply I cannot possibly post on the edventure forums, unfortunately, because I think my lecturer is enamoured with Mr Friedman.

Overcome by an overwhelming feeling of lethargy. I hate CS212 readings.

Happy Chinese New Year!

Yes, it's 1.38am in the morning and no, I'm not really doing that quaint chinese custom called "Shou Sui" where you stay up way past midnight to ensure your parents have long lives. Well, not intentionally, anyway... because this are my normal waking hours, I don't think it counts! Heh.

Chinese New Year resolution (yeah I'm weird, so sue me): No more swearing on my blog. I see how long I can tahan... =P

Was supposed to wake up at 6am this morning. Instead, because I had not slept for about 65 hours prior to last night, I managed to sleep through 4 alarms.

I should have just not slept last night, it would have made my life so much easier... But then again, I don't even remember going to bed last night! It's freaky really. I woke up to find I didn't switch off my computer, and didn't lock the door. My alarm clock was clenched in my fist. I don't remember turning off the lights even, everything after when I took my bath is a blank. O_o

If I go into Journalism, chances are, my working life is going to be just like that. Oh no.

CS212, aka Modern World History, is the most wholly depressing subject ever. Every reading is about some bunch of deluded fanatics trying to bomb the world to kingdom come.

I don't care what race or religion or fucking delusions of grandeur you have - it's innocent blood that is being spilled, and these are precious lives that you are selfishly and violently ending. There's got to be better ways to control the spreading of this pestilence on the face of the earth that is the human race.

Faith Healing
(by Philip Larkin)

Slowly the women file to where he stands
Upright in rimless glasses, silver hair,
Dark suit, white collar. Stewards tirelessly
Persuade them onwards to his voice and hands,
Within whose warm spring rain of loving care
Each dwells some twenty seconds. Now, dear child,
What's wrong, the deep American voice demands,
And, scarcely pausing, goes into a prayer
Directing God about this eye, that knee.
Their heads are clasped abruptly; then, exiled

Like losing thoughts, they go in silence; some
Sheepishly stray, not back into their lives
Just yet; but some stay stiff, twitching and loud
With deep hoarse tears, as if a kind of dumb
And idiot child within them still survives
To re-awake at kindness, thinking a voice
At last calls them alone, that hands have come
To lift and lighten; and such joy arrives
Their thick tongues blort, their eyes squeeze grief, a crowd
Of huge unheard answers jam and rejoice -

What's wrong! Moustached in flowered frocks they shake:
By now, all's wrong. In everyone there sleeps
A sense of life lived according to love.
To some it means the difference they could make
By loving others, but across most it sweeps
As all they might have done had they been loved.
That nothing cures. An immense slackening ache,
As when, thawing, the rigid landscape weeps,
Spreads slowly through them - that, and the voice above
Saying Dear child, and all time has disproved.

I want to kill the person next door to me. She keeps playing really sappy chinese pop from the 80s to early 90s. And I've heard "cheng li de yue guang" about 5 times.

Someone lend me a rifle. Or a baseball bat.

...Or I could just call the hall office and tell them she's got a guy spending the night in her room again.

Had full dress rehearsal for choir musical today, and to my great surprise, our guest performer is... *drumroll*

Tat Wee! On the drums! (At this point, the having a drumroll becomes quite corny. Not on purpose, I assure you...)

I'm pretty sure I freaked Shuhan out when he accidentally walked into the hall when we were practicing. He had a "WTH are you doing?!" look written all over his face... hahaha. Apologies, Shuhan! (By the way, you can come watch the full thing, with proper costume and makeup and lighting on 19th Feb, 8pm, at Victoria Concert Hall. Tickets at $15, get them from me =P)

^_________^

Thank you all for your well wishes today, I'm really touched! And special thanks to Kat Tj for organising the little surprise party in the wee hours of the morning, that was the best present ever =D And of course, my gratitude to all the members of our big Ohana who came as well - sorry for the fact that my room isn't very big so it was a bit squash-y ^^;

cHoiR r0x0RzZ! Heh.

Why did I ever sign up for Journalism Practicum? Yes I know it's going to be useful and all, but... *sigh* I wish I could be lazy for once.

So tonight will be another 5 or 6 hours laying pages. Which I wouldn't mind so much (I can do one page in about an hour if I'm fast) but the Chron room is freaking cold. Last night I was there for 3 hours and my hands were so purple, they bore closer resemblance to something from which life had long departed.

Am in the middle of tutorial right now, and I'm absolutely bored.

It's a web design class I took for the sake of easy credits. So now she's teaching the rest of the class how to hyperlink and I'm bored to death. Well... she did warn us that people who already knew stuff would be bored. Sigh. This is a waste of time! I could be-

...blogging in my room instead. Right.

"...he walked along the gravel path, holding his arms in a careful, prim posture; and something in his gait suggested that it cost him an effort to walk slowly - the effort of a man intent upon concealing the fact that he is inwardly running away."
(Thomas Mann Tristan)

Feeling completely drained. Every second semester is the semester I dread, because it just seems that there's so much to do and so little time for me to do pointless unproductive things like contemplate the meaning of life. (Which makes me wonder why contemplating the meaning of life falls under the category of "pointless unproductive things". I vaguely remember some character in Final Fantasy saying that human beings seek the meaning of life because we are mortal.)

Was contemplating taking one less module this semester, but I registered for it anyway. 2 days left to revise that decision. I doubt I'm going to drop it, because I want to complete as soon as possible, preferably with half a year to spare.

Why is everything in Singapore about speed and efficiency? I would love to have the time to savour the subjects I like, to explore and enjoy the process of acquiring knowledge just for the sake of storing away these various tidbits of information like precious gems, to admire and appreciate for another day. But all that really happens is a rapid torrent of facts I'm supposed to cram into my head and spit back out in organised categories 3 months afterwards. Words like 'productivity' and 'applicability' become exalted keywords; things that should truly matter, like 'learning' and 'enjoyment' get trampled and abandoned in the dust.

Every week I go for my one and only Lit lecture, and despite everything I am and I say, I fight to stay awake in the lulling wave of concepts like "Romanticism" and "religiousity". I fidget. I get bored. I make excuses to myself to escape from the lecture theatre every few minutes to settle choir things or school stuff. In the cacophony in my mind and the jarring interference of duties and responsibilities that the real world demands of me, I lose the capacity to appreciate the beauty of language and tranquility, of ideas and dreams.

My only solace is choir. At least I still feel that I am alive in the appreciation of music. But even that wears thin everytime we have to speed-learn a song, or other choir people mess around and do not put in enough effort (I feel) to get the feeling of the music. *sigh*

mood

Translation:
Nemo nisi mors.

the subject

utopist. dreamer. cynic. poet. a contradiction. eccentric. cartesian. a starlight in the gloom.

The patient, born in 1984, suffers from a history of idealism of unknown onset and duration.

bloghome | owl me

links

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~ Foamy the Squirrel
~ NTU Choir

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:: Jordie River
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:: NCHS Chinese Opera
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archives

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fanfic

:: Destiny Trilogy Part 1: The War
:: Destiny Trilogy Part 2: The Children of Lughnasadh
:: The Gates Just Opened